Well, I’m not dead. Or in prison. Or divorced. All things that I would have sworn would have happened by now had I kept on drinking. If you’ve followed along with my blog over the years, sparse as it has been, you’ll know that I went from a period of despair to one where I actually look forward to tomorrow.
I started a new job almost seven years ago and that has revitalized me. When the youngest went off to college, we packed up and moved away from Chicago – right before covid – and landed near the beach. Good Lord, if anybody needs a pick-me-up, packing up from Chicago and heading to the beach is sure to be just the thing.
My kids are doing so well, I’m bursting with pride. My daughter graduated from college 2 1/2 years ago with a 4.0 and is now half-way through dental school. My son will graduate as a Civil Engineer in December, 6 months early. Yeah, I’m bragging on my kids a bit – I should, I’m very proud of them. I do sometimes wonder how they would have turned out if I hadn’t stopped drinking? Knowing that the end was quickly approaching (read one of my earlier posts about that bright light coming at me – I knew the train was headed my way), I wouldn’t have been here for my kids. And losing their dad to prison or death when they were early teens? Yeah, that would have screwed them up. Kind of like what happened to me about a million years ago.
Once I had a year or two of sobriety under my belt, I really wondered what was my purpose in life. I decided that I wanted to be there for my kids – to help them get a great start in life. I’m so thankful that I was able to put down the bottle and do just that. And my kids, my wife, my family – and, hell, my whole life is all the better for it.
So, here I am living at the beach. I’m still working, but I’m not working myself to death. I try to enjoy the beach a few times a month, and I definitely go and enjoy all the great amenities that they have here in South Carolina.
I attend local meetings of AA here at the beach, which is kind of fun as you always see new people. Folks that are visiting, folks that are recently sober, and folks that have stories just like mine. That’s probably the most important take-away (for me) from this program – I’m not all that unique. Sure, I thought I was hot shit, that I was different from everybody else, that I had good reasons to drink. Ha! Funny, we’re all pretty much alike when you get right down to it.
I did hear some sad news today, though. My older sister is in the ICU and is not expected to make it through the week. Her story is pretty much my story – except it took her awhile to hit rock bottom. While she did eventually become sober, the toll on her was too much and she wrecked her body and now – at 59 – is on the way out. I’m sad for her, I’m sad for her family, I’m sad for her kids. But… that’s pretty much what happens if you keep drinking.
While I’ve had this website for 12+ years, and admittedly do a poor job of updating it, I do – from time to time – share the URL with folks and offer to tell my story in their own time. I recently met a young lady at a meeting locally where I shared the web address. And just this morning, my other sister asked me how I was able to stop? Apparently she has a friend with an adult son traveling the same road that we all traveled. I gave her the web address and, maybe, that guy will see enough in my story to know that it doesn’t have to end in misery. Good luck! And go to a meeting!